These articles are part of the One in a Million platform — a space for real, soul-to-soul connection. They’re here to support the deeper conversations I have with people one-on-one. Through mentorship, friendship, and real-time companionship, I offer a place to talk, reflect, and walk beside you on your journey. Each article is meant to spark reflection, open dialogue, and gently support you as part of the larger experience at oneinamillion.me.
There are moments when life feels utterly hollowed out — when the weight of what we’ve lost sits so heavily on our chest that even breathing feels like effort. In the wake of death, separation, betrayal, or sudden absence, we are left staring at the empty space where love once stood. Grief is not only an emotional state — it is a landscape we must walk through barefoot, raw and stripped. It pulls us down into the depths, not to punish us, but to invite us to be transformed. This aching sadness is sacred in its honesty, and it reminds us that to have loved — truly, deeply — is to grieve when what we love is torn away.
Reach out if your Feeling this Low.
Don’t do this alone.
I’ve been here and it’s far from fun! I don’t want you to do this alone, we don’t have to find the answers right now but just by talking it can help you feel stronger to navigate forward and I’ll be there to walk with you. Please reach out, its so much easier doing with with someone to talk to, trust me I’ve been there.
Hold on In There, You are not alone in how you feel here……
This is the realm of feeling it all. You haven’t shut down like in apathy — instead, you’re cracked open. The pain is real, raw, and alive. Something (or someone) mattered deeply, and now it’s gone. You feel shattered, overwhelmed, gutted.
This space is sacred. Because grief means something mattered. Sadness is not weakness — it’s the aching proof that you loved, that you cared, that you hoped.
But in this state, it can feel like the heart is too full to carry.
Sleep doesn’t bring rest.
Food doesn’t bring nourishment.
Words don’t seem to touch what’s broken.
You might be mourning a death, a betrayal, a version of yourself that didn’t survive. Or perhaps the loss is invisible — a dream that never came to be, a future you won’t get to live.
It’s not always obvious to others. But inside, you’re holding a storm.
Psychological Insight
Grief is a metabolizer. It is how the human psyche integrates change, rupture, and loss. When we try to rush through it or skip it, it doesn’t go away — it just goes inward, turning into depression, tension, anxiety, or disconnection.
Grief has no timeline. And it’s rarely “clean.” It comes in waves. And it’s often mixed with guilt, anger, regret, longing — even joy. This is because grief is not just the absence of what was lost — it is the presence of everything that was beautiful, and the reality that it’s now changing shape.
To feel grief is to remain alive. You’re still here, still caring, still feeling — even if it hurts.
“No one ever told me that grief felt so like fear.”
— C.S. Lewis
SELF-SOOTHING FROM
GRIEF, LOSS, DEVASTATION AND SADNESS
Mini-Process: Questions + Rant Builder
Self-Soothing Questions:
These questions act like emotional breadcrumbs — pulling someone gently out of the darkness without forcing positivity.
What am I grieving — and what did it mean to me?
Can I give myself permission to feel this, without judgment?
What if nothing is “wrong” with me — what if this is just what healing looks like?
What would I say to a friend going through this?
What might this grief be asking of me — to rest, to cry, to remember, to honor?
Can I trust that the waves will pass — and that I’m strong enough to stay afloat?
Is there something I can physically do to help process this, something symbolic when I feel ready, smashing, burning, planting writing alchemizing this, only when I am ready.
Self-Soothing Rant:
Talk to yourself as if you are your best friend, someone who cares. These sentences can be read silently to yourself. They can help you start to form your own sentences, your own self talk. Keep this momentum going, follow on from the ideas and start to create your own self rant talk, let the ideas flow, and if they don’t come, just keep reading these.
“This hurts because it mattered. I am not weak — I am human. This grief is not a sign I’m broken. It’s a sign that I loved, that I hoped, that I lived with my heart open.”
“Right now, I feel heavy. Lost. Like the ground beneath me shifted and I don’t know how to stand. But grief is not a punishment — it’s a process. A sacred one.”
“I don’t need to fix this. I don’t need to hurry this. I just need to be with it. Grief is the body’s way of honoring what was lost. It is holy work.”
“Somewhere in this pain, I can feel the echo of something beautiful — something I had, something I longed for. Maybe this sadness is proof that I really lived.”
“I can cry. I can rage. I can collapse. And still, I will rise again — not because I rushed through the pain, but because I let it move through me.”
“This grief is mine to carry. But I don’t carry it alone. Others have been here. Others have made it through. And I will too.”
“This will get a bit lighter with time, right now its overwhelming but today its enough that it wont always be so painful”
Keep going with your own inner voice. Keep reasoning your way into a space with more light. Keep speaking—let the sentences come to you freely. You are what you’ve been looking for. You can do this. Let your soul be your guide and your light. You are empowering yourself now to be your own guide, your own strength, your own light. You’re uncovering the most valuable thing you could ever discover: your true self. So work with this—don’t give up, my friend. This is the greatest gift you can give yourself: finding your way through this darkness, this rock bottom. Believe in your inner light. You can do this. Keep self-ranting, keep self-soothing.
“The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss… You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered.”
— Elisabeth Kübler-Ross and David Kessler
Reach out if your Feeling this Low.
I’ve been here and it’s something that I don’t want for you to have to do alone. Please reach out it just takes one single text or message.
One in a Million 
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